You’re scrolling through social media when you notice your friends hanging out without you. Again.
Your automatic response is to reach out to them and suggest an outing where you’re included next time. But then your mind is flooded with anxious thoughts. What if they don’t respond? What if they think you are annoying? Before you know it, you’ve talked yourself out of saying anything at all.
If this sounds familiar, you are not alone. Social anxiety affects millions of teens and young adults. Every day social interactions can feel like high-stakes situations where you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. And that’s just to say hi.
Here’s what you need to know: social anxiety is more than basic nerves or shyness. It’s a real mental health challenge that requires extra support.
What Social Anxiety Really Looks Like
Social anxiety extends beyond being considered an introvert. It’s a deep, internal fear of being judged or rejected by others, which can be so intense that it alters the way you live your daily life.
You may find yourself:
- Avoiding social situations, even ones you generally enjoy
- Overthinking and replaying conversations hours or days after
- Feeling physically sick before social events, including nausea, sweating, and trembling
- Struggling to make eye contact or speak up in groups
- Worrying constantly about what others think of you
- Canceling plans at the last minute because your anxiety is too overwhelming to work through
Your brain knows, on a rational level, that people are not often judging you that harshly, if at all. Unfortunately, that knowledge isn’t enough to stop your brain from spiraling or the onset of physical symptoms.
Why Social Anxiety Is More Than Shyness
While often used interchangeably, there is a difference between being shy and having true social anxiety. Shy people tend to feel uncomfortable in new situations, but they can usually push through it unscathed. With social anxiety, however, the fear can be so intense that it actively prevents you from participating in your own life.
Social anxiety can impact your ability to make friends and form meaningful relationships, speak up for yourself, attend parties or social events, or do everyday things like order coffee at a coffee shop.
Where Social Anxiety Comes From
Social anxiety typically develops during the teen years for the majority of people. For some, it stems from a specific embarrassing or traumatic experience. For others, it builds up gradually over time.
If you struggle with another mental health condition, like depression or ADHD, this anxiety can be connected to it. Your brain learns to associate social situations with danger or pain, even if you’re not entirely sure how the connection formed. Thankfully, just as your brain learned this connection, it can also establish new, healthier associations. That’s where therapy can be beneficial.
You’re Not Alone
If you’re dealing with social anxiety, you may be feeling like you’re the only one struggling like this. You should know that social anxiety is quite common, especially among the younger population.
Working with a therapist who understands the nuances of social anxiety can help you identify the root cause of your fears and develop healthy coping strategies so you can return to living. You don’t have to live with this crippling fear in every social situation for the rest of your life.
We specialize in helping teens and young adults work through anxiety that’s been holding them back. Our goal is to help you feel more confident and capable. If you’re ready to take the first step, reach out to us to learn more about anxiety therapy and how we can support you.